Secrets

First of all, I want to apologize for taking so DANG long to post something new.

I know I’ve got a lot of followers, and you guys are counting on me, and my friends keep emailing me and posting comments telling me to post something new.  Sorry.  Sincerely, I am.  I’m gonna try to frequently post stuff.  It’s been REALLY hard, what with a whole family issue that’s going on, and my dad found something bad on a WordPress site and started up a whole argument (jeez, WHY do people have to post bad stuff online anyway?!  Ugh).

So, anyway, here’s an excerpt from a pretty awesome story I’m writing (not named yet).  It turned out pretty interesting, so here it is:

The thing about secrets is that one secret, especially a big one, affects everything.

And if it’s related to a topic everybody likes to talk about, you’re put in an awkward situation in which you have to pretend you’re sleeping, or zoning out, or listening to music, in order to avoid the conversation.

Or if it’s a topic people like to joke about, your heart breaks a little every time they joke.  And you wish you could scream at them that they’ve no clue what they’re saying, but you can’t.  Because that would blow your cover.

It gets especially bad when somebody asks you a direct question about it — serious or not.

That’s when you have to lie.

Again.

And again.

Your lies become a whole network, a web, that traps you.  And it makes you a liar.  Even if you’re the only one who knows.  You’re still a liar.  And that turns into yet another reason you could never tell anybody your secret.  If you did, they would know you were a liar.  And even if you knew they would probably understand why you lied, they still wouldn’t trust you.  Not completely.

And so your web of lies grows ever stronger.

And no one knows.

Just you.

Just you.

~Emilino

Picture courtesy myinnergoddess.blogspot.com

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3 thoughts on “Secrets

  1. I still trust you, Em…. I love you so much!! If something is a secrest that could really damage someone’s life by not knowing, then you should really tell them. or if it damaging your sense of who you are, then you really need to spill your guts to whoever you lied to. trust me, I know. I didn’t tell my mom until about three years after I lied to her, and that was when it was basically ripping my heart out, and my life made no sense, and I felt like I was going to explode if I didn’t tell her, because it made me insecure about something in my life, some thing vital, that is super serious. man!! I was like flipping out!! nothing seemed to be real, I was having trouble sleeping at night…. Even Isaac noticed something was wrong!! I was like, totally depressed for a week, but then the Lord brought me back to reality, and now, I think I am closer to HIM than I ever would have been if I had kept the lie to myself.

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