Broken

We see a broken world
Of dead eyes and false smiles
Every hero, every villain
Become the same at night
As they cry themselves to sleep

And don’t try to tell me
That the cries of agony
Drifting down to us from hell
Will lessen as we get older

What kind of world
Would silence the cry of a human being
Because they don’t have a penis
Dangling between their legs?

What kind of society
Tells a girl to drown her flaws in makeup
But then turns in disgust
As she carves herself away?

What kind of God
Breathes life into a human
Only to toss them into flames?

No matter what any religion tells me
There is no song in heaven beautiful enough
To drown out the screams of hell

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Choice

There was a moment
Burned into my heart
Took me over by force
Left me begging for more

Took my hands and
Looked me in the eye
I couldn’t stand a chance
Just fell headfirst

In those eyes
I see fury and compassion
Pride and humility
And just a tinge of sadness

What can I do?
Can I even help myself?
Don’t know me anymore
And no one else does

It’s tearing me to pieces
Ripping up my heart
Getting mixed messages
Don’t know where to start

I’m a stranger
Where I used to be at home
I’m a criminal
Where I used to be pure

I know where I’m accepted
But that’s not where I should be
I know what I should choose
But I wish I could choose both

Why did this
Happen to me?
Why is it so
Wrong to you?

I miss my home I
wish I could go back
But I can’t
Not while I’m like this

Just because of this thing
Everyone could leave me
Sometimes it feels like God Himself
Has turned His face from me

This feels a lot like true love
But I’ve been raised to know it’s not
Maybe I would follow my heart,
but it’s “Deceitful above all things”

I’ve been rendered helpless
Completely defenseless
When I’m around my love
I can’t even think straight

My heart is torn
Between two loves
Am I doomed to give one up
In order to pursue the other?

Lost and Confused Signpost

~Emilino

Face of Boe

So I wrote this sonnet about Captain Jack Harkness for an English assignment and I quite like it. How can you go wrong with a poem about Doctor Who anyway? Well here you go.

I have what most men only dream to have,
Striving to achieve what they must not own.
Like petty fangirls, they obsess and crave,
Desire carved into human hearts of stone.
Where is the Doctor? He’s avoiding me
And doesn’t see how I need him to try.
The last Lord of Time, oh, doesn’t he see
When I am alone, how I long to cry?
Back then, she brought me, from death, back to life.
What lies in the darkness beyond this light?
She has spared me from fear of any knife
And I know the answer to man’s endless plight.
But I alone live as all others die,
So no one is there to watch as I cry.

~Emilino

Change

I know very well
How I’ve been changing
There’s nothing you could tell me
I haven’t noticed yet

This is a time
When I should be smacking
Away temptations
Like a baseball player at the bat

My friends are ready
When it comes their turn
But when it’s mine, right now
I’ve dropped the bat

The world is spinning
Like it always does
But mine is spinning
Faster every day

I used to think
Way, way too much
And that got me depressed
See, that’s something I often get

I’m sick of depression
And thinking too much
To be honest, reality
Is a sad, sad thing

So I took my perspective
And turned it around
I’ve made myself into someone
I used to envy every day

I hate to take the world for granted
I used to ward it off
But it’s something you have to do, sometimes
To avoid becoming sad

I’ve become a lot less awkward
And I have a lot less hair
But I’ve become a lot less thoughtful
I’m becoming what I’ve always feared

I have more confidence
And more self-esteem
I understand other people so much more
Than I ever did before

I used to be so different
Brilliant, quiet, and lonely
Didn’t know how to become someone
Everyone would like

And now I know how to charm
And I know how to talk
And I know how to be warm
And I know how to be fake

I always swore I’d never be like them
The ones who live like there’s no tomorrow
But now I’m just like them
Almost living like there’s no tomorrow

The only difference is that
I remember what it was like
To be different, and to tell you the truth…
I don’t know whether to miss it or not.

Stolen Glances

Keep looking at you
If only you knew
All these thoughts in secret
But secret’s all I get

The way you are is crazy
How can I resist
Can you really blame me
It’s not anything I did

You make me feel so guilty
When you joke around
Every time you touch me
My stomach hits the ground

Baby can you hear
This desperation in my heart
Every time you’re near me
Feel my heartbeat start

I can’t ever tell you
I couldn’t if I tried
I’ll keep on admiring you
From the corner of my eye

I could record your voice
Every little word you say
Keep you in my head and
Replay you all day

I notice things about you
I can’t stop watching you
I could list off all your features
Go ahead, call me a creeper

Whatever it is, darling
I won’t let you leave
You’ve got an air about you
I cannot believe

You’re too good to be true
Who cares about romances
Be my friend and I’m okay
With just my stolen glances.

Image

~Emilino

Sugar High

How does this happen?
How do you do this to me?

Your presence in the room gives me ADD
Can’t concentrate, can’t focus
I can’t stop trembling

Your touch sends fireworks through my blood
My heart skips a beat
Every time I see you

You’re like a fat-free sugar high
A thousand Cokes
Coursing through my veins

The sound of your voice
Sends me spinning into outer space
It’s intoxicating

I could listen to your voice forever
Fall asleep to you whispering in my ear
Please, don’t ever, ever stop

That giggle that bubbles from your throat
Leaves me breathless
Sends my heartbeat off the charts

Could you take it easy on me
Just a bit?
But no, don’t, I’m enjoying it too much

I know you probably don’t feel the same
You don’t shudder at the sight of me
But please, please, stay with me forever

You know, I’m always here
To take you, and hold you
And love you forever

You don’t always have
To be the strong one
You can be weak with me

So come on, take my hand
Oh, I’d do anything
Come with me, we’ll do whatever you want

I don’t know if you knew
But hey
I’ve fallen so hard for you

Bet you didn’t know
But now you do
I love you.

~Emilino